Anna Quindlen "Stuff is Not Salvation" to me is explaining how people are showing there success in life by there bisections. It also talks about how people end up not appreciating what they have and would put them self in bigger financial debt to get more things they do not need. Anna solution for this problem is for people to learn to appreciate what they already have.
When I read this paper a few people came to mind that reminded me of these things that she was talking about, first there was my brother who to me is one very selfish person who would put his own needs above anyone else, But after reading it a few times I started thinking of myself for awhile my girlfriend and I have been trying to save money and we always find a way to spend it and it is usually on stuff we don't need and because of this we have a habit of buying stuff for my son that he really does not appreciate. My son got to the point were he became very destructive with his toys, so one day we took all his toys away and gave him one toy he could pick out a day. This seems to be working cause he is less destructive and we have been able to save a little money. This does not solve my problem of me useless spending I always find thing I want to start doing like spending three hundred dollars on air soft guns I only used once. The guns have been sitting in my closet for almost a year. This is why I have to learn that the thing I want are not the thing I need.
I think you did a great job in how you ordered every story in your essay. You didn’t have much out of order on a time line kind of thing. I think you could use more vivid and more description words to help the reader follow along. Be sure to reread and check for grammar errors. I had a little trouble reading parts that had the wrong work in place, other than that though you have a good example to work from. Good job.
ReplyDeleteYou need to check your punctuations more also I did not see a period either.
ReplyDeleteI liked reading your point of view on Quindlen's story. Your story well written to, I think you missed an "s" or two on some of your words but I still got the point of you story. Great job.
ReplyDeleteGood job explaining Quindlen's article. I hadn't thought of it like that regarding the success in people's lives. You had a run on sentence in the second paragraph but other than that it was good!
ReplyDeleteI feel that you really understood the prompt and answered the questions accurately. Just make sure proofread next time because there were some misspelled words, but nothing major though.
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